Well, I talked to my stepdad. He took it pretty cool. He said he's not gonna say anything to my mom or my grandmother for now.

I gotta talk to the finanical aid here at school and see if it's gonna affect my grant or anything. He seems sorta supportive, like...if it's what I really think I need. But at the same time, he said "If it's gonna mess your school up...you're gonna have to suck it up and quit on your own." which...uhm...no? Cause that didn't work... :\

Like they don't even know the whole story. All they know that I've done is ex & pot. Cause before when I moved to Dallas, that's what I got into. And they don't know all the other shit I've done since I've moved back home... and I'm probably never gonna tell them that.

I'll be straight up with the people at rehab, but they gotta keep that shit confidential, right? So yeah. I mean, I'll tell them about it all cause they gotta know anyhow.



Sometime in '05 or '06

Alcohol - I don't really have a problem with it at all. I mean, seriously. I used to drink more often than I do now, but even then it wasn't much. But ever since I found real drugs, alcohol doesn't do much for me or mean much to me anymore.

Summer '07

Riddlin - This is what REALLY started my drug usage. I bought like 20 (or maybe it was 40?) pills at one time and popped 2 or 3 at a time. I was sharing them with 2 friends. I liked it, but after I ran out that first time, I didn't bother with it any more.

Ecstasy - Gonna be the hardest thing to drop. This is the one that made me start using on a more regular basis. It's the best thing in the world to me. I can name a lot of the diff types I've taken too.
Blue smilies
Yellow X-Boxes
Yellow Rubber Duckies
Green Spades
Pink Motorollas
Blue Underarmors
Green Addidas
Green Star of David
White Smlies
Green Naked Ladies


Acid (LSA) - Only did it once, pretty neutral about it

Fall/Winter'07

Pot - Gonna be the easiest thing to drop. I've only been smoking for about 2-3 months, seriously. I've only had my own weed 3 or 4 times in my life. Dimes & dubs, only.

Overdosed on Robotussin Gelcaps - I'm pretty neutral about this. I've done it a few times and it feels pretty awesome when it hits, but I could never make myself down the syrup, so the downside always was t hat it made me gag when I took all 20 caps, and it made me sick to my stomach, but not bad enough that I couldn't ignore it easily.

Coke - The high's not long enough to be worth the money, seriously. I like doing it though. I think I just like the act of snorting the line. It's weird... But it'd be a really amazing drug if the high would last longer.

Pot - Gonna be the easiest thing to drop, seriously. I've been smoking for about 2-3 months, only ever bought 20s, only ever had 3 of those in that time. Pot isn't a big deal to me at all.

Hydrocodone - Once or twice. I only remember doing it once, and it wasn't that great. But I apparently had loratabs over that 4 day binge and they're a form of hydrocodone

Xanax - Gonna be harder, but not too bad I don't think? I'm not addicted, but it's fucking cool. Weird, but I really like popping these, even though they aren't an upper and that's usually what I'm into...

Meth - Never did it (except the ex tabs that were cut with it), but I've been thinking over the last few weeks about wanting to smoke it, even though I've seen what the addiction does to you. But I just really love uppers....



Seems kinda odd that my use got WORSE when I moved back home, AWAY from the girl that got me started into all of this in the first place...